Dr. Seuss

I know this is some sort of blasphemy, but:

 I do not like Dr. Seuss. 

 I do not like him with a goose.

 I'd like to hang him with a noose.

I think it's hard enough to explain real words, but how do you explain the made up ones? Cassie is just learning to love reading but she finds it frustrating to read Dr. Seuss because she's not sure if the words are real or made up. Hannah is too curious to just sit and enjoy a lyrical sounding story, she points at each thing on each page and asks what it is, then I have to say things like, Well that is a wump.  And that is a woozle.  She asks if that is a boy or a girl, but the answer is complicated because it is actually a cat-like thing called Mike that is furry and tall and pushes bikes up hills.  Maybe my imagination is stunted or something but I like to read stories and ask questions about the possibilities of each page.  Like, "What do you think will happen next?" or "What would happen if the bunny doesn't go down the hole?" etc.  Is it strange to not adore Dr. Seuss?

Funny Face

Hannah wanted to take funny pictures with the computer.  I'm afraid she only has two "funny" faces.  One is "mad face" as shown in photo #1.  The other is from the manners flash card hall of fame, as shown in photos #2-#4.  The latter also showed up in the passport photo rejects.  I am not really one to talk as I only seem to have one funny face.  Scrunched up nose face.

The Mystery of the Plates

I LOVE my husband.  Really, really love him.  He is the opposite of me in most ways.  I suppose that is why it works so well.  I don't really need a lot of answers, I'm pretty satisfied to let mysteries exist as long as they don't disrupt my day or potentially cause harm.  My husband, however, needs ANSWERS.  For instance, yesterday he unloaded the dishwasher and it seemed to him that there were a few too many plates.  

Paul:  What's with all the plates?  Did you take them out of the cabinet to wash them?

Natalie:  Well, no, because that's stupid.

Paul:  Did you buy more plates?

Natalie:  No.  I made food, we ate it on plates, I put the plates in the dishwasher.  

Paul:  But you still haven't answered my question.  Why so many plates?

Natalie:  This is an asinine conversation that I am not having. Ever.  

Then I threw the plate at his head thereby lowering the mysterious plate count by one. 

Not really, I sort of like my plates and I really like my husband's head.  I just passive aggressively put a post it note on the dishwasher explaining the day's plate usage.

Handsome

Every night when I kiss Hannah goodnight I also have to kiss all of the things in her bed.  If she is complaining about going to bed (read EVERY NIGHT) I call everything by the wrong name just to distract her.  I kiss her and call her Nicole.  I kiss a random Nicole and call it Cassie.  Last night I forgot to kiss Boo.  She pulled him out from under the covers and said, "And who is this handsome young man?"  I think she is too young to have handsome young men in her bed.