You Don't Get a Badge for Everything

Juliette (Daisy) Gordon Low, founder of the Girl Scouts

I was probably the oldest living Girl Scout, except maybe Juliette Gordon Low. I was lucky enough to be in a wonderful troop that never finger painted or glued macaroni onto cigar boxes that were then spray painted gold. Instead we did some hardcore scouting; things similar to what Boy Scouts would do, heaven forbid. It was the same group of us from 5th grade through 12th grade, so we were pretty tight (and yes, I said 12th grade.) For every new adventure we successfully completed, we earned badges that were sewn on our fancy green vest. Those who know me know that I was just in it for the badges.

We hiked part of the Appalachian Trail with a woman named "Mama Boots". At the time we were in the 8th grade and all that was important to us was sleeping in, our hair and boys. You can understand the frustration Mama Boots felt when we were not exactly psyched to get up at 5 am and start our day of sweaty walking. I grudgingly earned this:

We spent many weekends at Barren River Lake earning our American Red Cross Sailing cards. We navigated our little Sunfish sailboats all over that lake and although I know the difference between port and starboard, I can't remember any of the fancy knots. But still, I earned this:

I won a ton of cookie contests because, for whatever reason, I was never too embarrassed to take my cookie order form to high school to get my orders. It's not like I wore the vest to school or anything. Yet, I'm pretty sure that I was made fun of , but at the time I was all about winning, and I had pretty great sales strategy. I knew that the kids who hung out on the "smoking patio" in my school would probably have the munchies at some point during the day. They were always my best customers. (They don't have smoking patios in high school anymore, do they?) It was worth the humiliation in order to sew this beauty on my vest:

When I was 16 I went to Great Britain with a group of Girl Scouts, a few of the girls had been in my troop since we were 10 years old. The others were probably just the only other 16 year old Girls Scouts in the state that wanted to travel. All 12 of us went to Ireland, Scotland and England for 3 weeks with only 2 adult chaperones. I can't imagine how my parents must have worried. I can't imagine how those 2 adult chaperones survived. We travelled around on a huge tour bus with our very own guide who would occasionally scream at us for sleeping when there was so much history to be seen. He was proud of his country and it's landscape and we were 16 year olds. We stayed at Bed & Breakfasts that served us six course dinners every night. We were conceited enough to think that even though we were told that our curling irons wouldn't work without a converter, it certainly looked like they would. I still remember the smell of burning hair right before the breaker tripped. Our super cool bus driver took us out at night for our first beers in a pub (the drinking age in Ireland was 16!) I'm pretty sure neither our chaperones nor parents were aware of this fact. It all just horrifies me to think of this now. I'm sure we didn't deserve it, but we received the travel badge:

When I was 18 I spent a few days with a friend (another scout) helping the younger girls at Houchens Day Camp. We helped with outdoor activities, campfire cooking, and nature hikes. We were practically adults, you know, so we were allowed to set up tents and spend the night at camp. I don't recall the logistics of this next part, but our boyfriends came to visit us late in the night. Now remember, this was back in the day, so there were no cell phones, and most boys had never been to the girl scout camp before, so I don't know how they found us. Don't worry, we were good girls, yet I'm afraid there are no badges for that.

We went on a survival week. I may have some of the details wrong, but as I remember it, we were dumped in the middle of nowhere with flint and a ziplock baggie of powdered milk. For that experience we earned both the outdoor survival and the orienteering badges:

We did crazy ropes courses and rappelling adventures that earned us this one:

During high school I submitted an essay and received a scholarship for college, although I am convinced that I was probably the only college age Girl Scout left to apply.

My vest was filled front and back with all my badges and pins from my Brownie days on up. After college, while cleaning my old stuff out of Mom and Dad's house, I found a box filled with things I didn't think I would need again. So, I threw it out, and inside that box was my Girl Scout vest. Maybe one day I will get another one and this time I will earn these:

The Stress Less Badge

The Healthy Relationships Badge

The Conflict Resolution Badge