Inappropriate Things To Do at Barnes & Noble
- Talk on your cell phone while in the bathroom, while going to the bathroom.
- Yell at an employee while turning in an application.
- Bring a large group to the cafe and smush all the tables together, then spread out your ChicFilA bags.
- Pick out every decorating book that is in stock and leave them piled on your table until 5 minutes after closing time.
- Drop your children off while you shop next door at T.J. Maxx.
- Spill your decaf soy white chocolate extra hot mocha all over a table of books and not tell anyone (I know who you are!)
- Stay in the store after you hear the closing announcement, then tell me that you are "Wrapping things up."
- Take off your shoes and curl up in our cushy chairs. I don't know how to clean toe jam off cushy chairs.
- Ask me where the copy machines are.
- Try to convince me of the wonderfulness of the Kindle while at the customer service desk.
- Act like you know more about espresso than any other person could ever know. Coffee is coffee, dude.
- Hide books in my store because you are reading them and you don't want anyone to purchase them, then get annoyed when we put them back in their proper locations.
- Steal
- Lie
- Be mean to my employees.
- Be mean to me.
- Buy a piece of cheesecake and leave the best part.
- Act like I'm a dummy because I don't know the book you are asking for. You know, that one that you claim is a bestseller? There are a gajillion bestseller lists out there, people.
- Repeatedly tell me that you are in a hurry. This tends to slow me down.
- Ignore me when I smile and say hello, as if I am just a piece of the cash register.
9 comments:
Long day at work? Me, too. Here's my favorite for today - 21. Show a bookseller a positive pregnancy test at info.
Oh yes, and today a woman pulled her money out of her bra to pay for her drink in the cafe. Then she told us that she also has her cellphone and a package of gum in there. I think bra money is #22.
Ahh, good times at B&N. I sort of miss it.
Also, do I remember somebody peeing on the toilet paper in the men's room?
How about, don't crouch down and pretend you're looking at a book on the bottom shelf and them try to sniff/lick my feet? Or, how about don't let me catch you coming out of the bathroom with the Playboy? At least leave it in there! Or, how about don't leave your plate from the cafe wedged between two books in the si-fi section? I have a picture of that one.
This made me laugh out loud! Particularly the copy machine one.
- Amanda M.
memories...
What about writing someone's name in poo on the men's room wall? Or talking on your cell phone while holding up a long line of customers at the cash wrap. Or how about licking the honey off a stir stick from the "public/complimentary" honey jar in the cafe?
I love it when you spend 15 minutes helping a customer find that "onsie" in bargain that they just have to have. You emerge victorious, feel so proud that you've made them happy. 30 minutes later you find it crammed on a shelf back in Sci Fi. Very disappointing.........or the overzealous customer who tells you why "you need" to read this book, usually from the "Left Behind" series......
or when a teenager comes in to find a biography for a book report and all they care about is which is the shortest one......my all time favorite from years back- when a customer marched up to cust service demanding a copy of "The Wrath of Grapes!" Times like those make it all worthwhile....
Oh, ho ho!! I heart that list.
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